Hey Guys,
So today this is going to be a slightly different blog post... I wrote a short monologue for my English coursework and I was quite proud of it, so I just wanted to share it quickly, let me know what you think :)
I am a woman in her early 20's. My name is Aria. Aria Fitzgerald. I am of medium height, but quite slim for my age! I have long curly blonde hair, and I suffer with anxiety. Brighton, where I live, is a quaint little town, weekends and holidays are my worst nightmare! The sun comes out and people flock from all over to this little town by the sea. This makes my anxiety worse, I feel like I can't go out the house, even the slightest thing makes me anxious, I feel I can't cope.
I live with my best friend Ramona, and my boyfriend Nate they help me a lot with everything, they are my rocks. if I have a panic attack they are always there to calm me down, or remove me from the situation that makes me anxious.
the year my parents died in a car crash was the worst of my life for my anxiety, for the six months after I went into a state of shock where every little thing that happened sent me into panic attack. I was so frightened to leave the house, I was afraid that if anything good happened to me, it would be taken away as soon as it was given. I began to push people away, first Ramona, no matter how hard she tried, I became withdrawn from everything. and her. I then pushed Nate away I was frightened that if he stayed with me, something bad would happen, he stayed though. for those six months he stuck by my side, and slept on the sofa, which I imagine couldn't have been comfortable.
By Christmas I slowly but surely began to become less withdrawn, I was like a polar bear coming out of hibernation. But sure enough Nate and Ramona were there to help me through, to get me reintegrated within the human way of life. it started by taking little walks just down to the sea front, which I found to be a great source of comfort during the last six months, there was something about the sea that calmed me, the peaceful serenity of the waves flowing in and out, against the sea shore. I then got more confident, and started making trips on the train up to London for various outing or meetings. This is when life really started to get back to normality I started going out with my friends, partying, having fun. Doing this still made me anxious at times but I learnt to control it, I had to remove myself from any situation that made me anxious, even if it meant going outside to get some air.
now one year on, I am living proof that it does get better, no matter what dark moments you are experiencing in your life at the moment, you always have to remember things get better. I a now living in a little seaside cottage with the love of my life, Nate. we are engaged and I am so happy he stuck with me through my dark state of mind and didn't give up on me.
Thank you for taking the time to read this,
(it is in no way written from personal experience, I just wrote what came into my head)
Love, Becca
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